The Musings of Mireya Browning

I love the, “don’t power clean in church.” Yeah! One more!
Not in church!

Our home theater pc runs retarded windows. Today while watching some highly sophisticated entertainment(spongebob) the computer crashed. Some of our most precious valuables run on that thing. Our home videos, blu-ray movies and the most sacred of all, our Spongebob collection.

I protest for something more reliable but Dan insists we use XP. He claims some of the software we use is made to only run on windows.

I wish consumers new how crappy windows is. Bill gates is the wealthiest guy in the world. Ask yourself how he got there. We’re been hustled in to using his crap. It’s a monopoly. Now software companies only make their stuff to run on one operating system. Shouldn’t it be made to run on any operating system? I’m telling ya, it’s a monopoly.

This is a democracy, we the people have the power. Everyone! Don’t buy microsoft and commit yourselves to the Open source revolution.

My old site was an eye sore and made me cringe. It was oogly and needed some work. I have all these great ideas for my hideous site but I can’t do them myself. I live with a genius programmer and still no progress has been made on my honey do list. According to Dan my site is competing with “real” work. To you, Dan, I say, working on my site may not profit any paychecks but it may cost you accolades and favorite dinners from your wife.

Impatient as I am, I waaant it and I want it NOW. (*cleansing breath*) But, I will be reasonable and I’ll take what I can get when I can get it.

And to my select readers, if your eyes bleed when you read my blog and would like to make a complaint. Feel free to e-mail Dan some spam, as a message that he needs to work on his wife’s blog. Thank you.

the office jello mould

the office investigation

When I’m feeling mischievous I have been known to pull naughty pranks. Sometimes when Dan is in the shower I wait for him to be soaping his face and I turn the water nozzle all the way to cold. What makes this prank work so well so is our plumbing does a fantastic job at getting cold quickly and a terribly long time turning hot again. Its really great. I’ve also dumped an entire pitcher of ice cold water over the curtain while he is showering. But my height makes this one a little more difficult to accomplish. In one of our bathrooms the light switch is next to the door which is on the other side of bathroom from the toilet and bath. Dan will be using the loo or the bath, it doesn’t really matter and then opps I turned the lights off. Its so much fun. Dan has patience and a good sense of homour to be able to live with me. His pranks are sweeter than mine. He peels my oranges for me in one entire peel. What kind of pranks have you guys done?

“How do you write women so well?” -receptionist

“I think of a man, and I take away reason and accountability.” - Jack Nicolson, as Melvin Udall, As Good as it Gets.

I don’t watch Oprah. I’ve been in situations where a group of ladies are talking about how great Oprah’s latest show was and how it made them cry. I just politely nod my head and listen without saying a word. When they ask me what I liked about the show in my monotonous tone I reply “I don’t watch Oprah.” It’s funny. They stare at me eyes wide and bewildered like they didn’t compute what I just said. And a couple of seconds later once they get what I’ve said their looks turn from confused to horrified as if I said I hate kittens.

Most women practically run on emotion, they whine and talk psychobabble as if psychobabble were a real science. Her show is mindless drivel and it hurts women. Unfortunately they don’t realize it.

God made us as emotional beings, but he also made us with a brain. Life requires reason, good sense and wisdom. I’m a chick. I’m just as emotional and hormonal as the next woman. I just try to not let my emotions govern my decisions.

Oprah’s religion is kinda nutty.

Nerdcore looks interesting other than the d&d, pron and cursing. If I nerd rapped it would be like White and nerdy. Nerd parody rap would be so funny.

Reminds of Defcon.

“Denser alloy. My father gave it to me. I think he wanted me to kill you.” - Sonny
I’m quoting my favorite quotes from I Robot.

The Fresh prince has come long way. He has starred in some excellent movies like(MIB and it’s sequel are not one of them) Pursuit of Happiness and I-Robot. (I haven’t seen Ali yet, so I can’t say)

We just saw I am Legend on Blu-ray. It was so awesome. I liked it but not as much as I Robot. The Fresh Prince has a habit of acting the same in most of his movies. His repertoire is as wide as a rapper gone actor. He plays a sincere smart A double snakes tough guy in MIB, i robot, Independence Day, and in I am legend. With that said. The movie was good. He dies in the end for theatrical effect but I would have preferred that he lived. By the end of the movie viewers feel relief that they survived with an antidote but something philosophical would have been nice for viewers to ponder.

Interestingly in his next movie Hancock, his character is described as “Edgy, conflicted, sarcastic, and misunderstood,”(apple.com/trailers) Thats funny.

Digital shorts have been some of my favorite parodies on SNL. The first laser cat shorts were okay, but the third is so funny. The wardrobe is creative and the acting is so hilarious. I can’t decide on my favorite part. I laughed out loud through a lot of parts. Tell me what you think. And while your on the SNL site check some of my other favorites; Young Chuck Norris and Andy punches.

You’ll need to watch 15 seconds of ads before the digital short.
Laser Cats 3

Here are Laser cats 1 and Laser cats 2.

Living in a mixed home can be confusing and frustrating. We have three running computers in our home. One runs apple, another linux and lastly (Ugh *shudders*) windows. I’ve learned some simple apple jargon. So far I know apple key.

Apple runs much better than windoze and is more aesthetically pleasing than linux.

Linux is really solid but it lacks the windows ease that I’ve been brainwashed to use and sadly compare everything to.

Dan has shown me his Macbook pro and I found it to be very pleasant. Maybe I can get Dan to get me one of those fandangle apple book things. : )

After dinner this evening Dan had a sweet tooth. “What would you like?” I ask. “Ice cream with chocolate, no butterscotch.”

“Okay,” I say, “you got it.”

Ten minutes later. I whipped up butterscotch and chocolate syrup from scratch. (store bought with preservative is no good)

“This is the best home made ice-cream.” His face is all the thanks I need.

It’s a curse knowing what do with sugars and fats.

I suppose the curse isn’t so much what I do with the sugars and fats but where I put them. The years have shown them to be contributions to my adipose tissue.

With great power comes great responsibility. I love to make Dan happy but not if the cost includes his health. I have a lot of influence on my family. I try to cook organic healthy meals. But I care about taste. And ask any French chef (not that I am one) fats taste good, like butter and cream. Seriously, how good is a grilled cheese with out gruyere or St. Vincent aged gouda in cheese steak sandwiches. Meals shouldn’t be limited by caloric value but taste and inspiration.

I fell in love with cooking and almost a decade later…well, like I said it’s a curse.